I have been working on this new dating site for months now and it is finally ready. For years I have had requests from so many people who wanted to know where and how to meet transmen, and from transmen who wanted a safe place they can meet people to hook up. I decided to start my own site.
It will be a really great place for all trans* people and those who dig us. Please take a minute to check it out and tell your friends about it too. It’s about time we had our own special corner of the web to play in!
If you don’t see your particular category represented, please let me know.
Dear Buck Angel, I recently watched your It Gets Better video and you said that people could email you so I decided to. I apologize in advance if this letter is wordy and awkward. I haven’t had anybody to reach out to so I’m going to try to tell someone my story. In recent weeks, I’ve been very unsure of my gender. It started with some friends joking around about what would happen if I were a girl and now I can’t stop thinking about it. I’ve had thoughts like this and cross-dressed in private since I was about nine or ten. I’m fifteen now and it’s starting to tear me apart. It’s like there are two sides of me and the boy and the girl in me are arguing with each other constantly. It makes concentrating hard and I’ve spent more time crying in the past couple weeks than I have in years. I am afraid. I am so afraid. I’m afraid to lose friends. I’m afraid of what my family will think. I’m afraid of what will happen. I am so afraid. I just don’t know what to do and right now it feels really good to be able to tell someone this at this moment. If you read this I thank you very much from the bottom of my heart. You are a huge role model to me and I am so glad I have someone like you to look up to. Best Wishes, Sam
Thank you for your email. I know it must be super hard to be dealing with this at your age. I know because I did as well and it sucks. Also people just do not seem to understand us at all. So do not feel singled out there are many like you.
Please do not be afraid. I think if it is possible that you can find a counselor at school who you think might be friendly to this conversation they could at least point you to a place to get some therapy. You need to talk to someone about this so you know that it is ok to feel this way. You are very normal trust me. If your friends are really your friends then they will understand.
I am not sure how your parents are with you but if you feel close enough and trust them enough to discuss wanting to go to an LGBT counselor that would be a great start for you. Try to find a LGBT community center near where you are.
Remember you are not alone. That is why I made that video so you can know that it is ok and that I do not want someone like yourself to go through the pain I did. But I did survive and there is hope. So start with what I said above and take it one day at a time. You must learn to love yourself and know that you are an important part of the world.
I care about you my friend so stay in touch with me so I can see how your doing.
I lived 5 years of terror. The sex change was a mistake..
My name’s S, I’m from Portugal, and I’m 28 years old. Firstly I would like to say, you’re doing an amazing work. You’re unbelieveble!!! :) You’ve been such an inspiration for my situation. Unfortunately, my situation is a little bit different than usual. But i have hope, I’ll be ok! So, let me tell you, when I was 19 years old, I did a gastric Bypass to lost weight. I was obese, and after surgery I lost 150 pounds. All my life I suffered from dysmorphic disorder, because I was fat, and I didn’t accept my homossexuality. So, I put in my head that I had to change my sex to female, to feel better with myself. When I was 23 years old, I’ve changed to female. I did the treatment, and all surgeries in Thailand. I lived 5 years of terror. The sex change was a mistake…and I did that. I tried the suicide for three times…I didn’t know how to live as a female, because I didn’t feel as a woman. I was misdiagnosed by my psychiatrist, because I was evaluated for six months only, before the SRS. That’s not enough to diagnose gender dysphoria. So, after these 5 years of hell, I decided ask for help. And I’m being helped by a medical team, and I’m changing to male, again. This is an unusual situation in the world, but it happens. I’m taking testosterone since December 2011, and I also removed the breast implants. :) Now I’m feeling much better at home. Because I don’t know how to deal with people yet. I have a little social phobia. I’m always scared of what people gonna say about me…about my appearence. You know…my brain is still receiving all the new information. But I have hope and faith I’ll be ok. One day I’ll feel much better with myself. :) Two sex changes in one life is complicated. ahahaha… :p
I would like to keep in touch with you, if you have some advice to me. And thank you so very much for your support. You’re amazing. You’re an inspiration! Never give up from what you’re doing Buck. :)
Hi S, Thank you so much for telling me your story. WOW what a story to tell. I am so happy that you seem to have finally found peace and where you need to be in life. Sorry you had to go through so much to get here. I also wanted to tell you that I have received other letters very similar to yours in regards to people feeling they needed to have a sex change in order to fit in and then down the road realized they made a mistake. This is why I do stress that it is a very important choice to make and to be sure you understand the importance of this. Not to just change to fit in. Being gay and being transsexual are two different things. I am so sorry your doctor had no clue! There are groups out there for men like yourself so find a good support group to help with your transition. Just remember to love yourself first and not care what other think of you. You will do fine and keep in touch with me as I would like to see how your doing. WOOF! Buck Angel® Pioneering Filmmaker, Speaker, and Advocate
My Mom helps me get the message out! It was not easy to grow up feeling out of place but my Mom was always really there for me. Even when I was strung out on drugs.
Today we have a amazing relationship and she is so open to me being her son that she was willing to do this PSA for me to help other families who struggle.
I hope you really enjoy this an know how important this message is. Do me a big favor and pass it along it is an great message and I want my Mom to see the thousands of hits it gets so she will understand even more how powerful the message is.
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As an icon of popular culture, Buck Angel's message of empowerment through
self-acceptance and being sexually comfortable in your own skin has struck
a passionate chord with folks all over the world. Buck is not only inspiring people to think outside the box, he is re-defining gender and educating an entire generation on the fluidity of sexuality and identity politics.